The Second Time
by donnaspecter
Summary: -"You know it just occurred to me that you and I don t work together anymore." she said, in an angry tone leaning against the door frame of his apartment. Donna came rushing into his building the second she heard from Jessica that Harvey resigned. He didn t even tell her.- Darvey (Donna and Harvey) fanfic. Angst. M rated for language and certain events. I hope you enjoy. -A xxx
1. Chapter 1

**Hello :) Here again with another one shot fanfic BUT I am not completely sure if this will actually only be one chapter or I will make it multi chapter. Lets forget about Mike´s arrest and pretend that Harvey only resigned and then went home because that's what I did writing this lol.**

 **Also this is M-rated because of the swearing and possible progress later on in this story if I continue it. I hope you enjoy! xxx**

"You know it just occurred to me that you and I don´t work together anymore." she said, in an angry tone leaning against the door frame of his apartment. Donna came rushing into his building the second she heard from Jessica that Harvey resigned. He didn´t even tell her. The truth was- he couldn't. First she left him and that felt like a half of their story finished and then he had to resign and that to him- meant like they were done and he was too weak to face her not knowing her reaction.  
"Yeah that didn´t just occure to you." Harvey responded, he knew she was mad but he tried to lighten up the mood, feeling chills go down his body at the thought of how their roles were reversed 12 years ago when she stood in her apartment, saying these exact words. The soft sound of a record was filling in the silence that fell between them and it was already past 11pm.

"No it didn´t, Jessica told me. I had to hear it from Jessica, what the fuck Harvey? You coming to me saying you wanted to be friends again and I thought that was the truth. And you didn´t even have the curtesy to fucking tell me yourself?" She said near tears.

The fact that he kept the most important decision in his life from her like that, hurt Donna more than she would care to admit.  
"I couldn't tell you Donna!" he shouted as he waved his hands in the air. That´s when she pushed him aside and made her way inside his apartment.

"Couldn´t? Oh really? And why is that? You just couldn´t walk to my desk and say _'Hi Donna, just thought I would tell you I am leaving you'_ you just couldn't do that Harvey?"

"Leaving you? I am leaving you? YOU LEFT ME!" He shouted, the tension between them was growing with each second.  
"I didn´t move to Louis to leave you. I moved to Louis to make you realize that you didn´t want me to leave you. Well apparently you are comfortable with doing just so!" He had a confused look on his face trying to understand what she just said.

"Yes Donna I couldn't tell you because if I just saw your face I wouldn't have been able to fucking leave this job." and his whole body tensed, his hands pushed into fists and he wanted to hit the wall.  
"Oh really, and why is that Harvey? just tell me why?! What am I to you? What kept you away from telling me? You told everyone else and that didn't keep you away from leaving?" She said, confused and angry. Soo angry at him for hurting her and angry at herself for letting him do it, again.

"Because I love you and me leaving means we are done Donna. Until now at least I could look at you from far away but now, I won´t even have a chance to!" he screamed, the adrenaline driving through his veins not making him realize the weight this words carried.

"I will ask you this one more time and if you don't answer Harvey, I will leave and I will not turn around. We will be done. How do you love me Harvey?" She said, looking at him with such determination and anger that he couldn't move. His eyes started watering and he pressed his hands to his head and turned around. He couldn´t take the pressure and he was scared of her not feeling the same.

 _I love you like a brother, or a cousin_ \- she said once, making him even more insecure about his feelings for her.

"Answer my god damn question!" She screamed, no, she begged.  
"I am in love with you Donna and you know how? I will fucking tell you how. In love with you in the way where you drive me insane and every guy you talk about I hate him instantly and I want to beat the shit out of him and I love you the way I want to throw myself off a building because I never want to know how you love me, unless you love me the same fucking way. Which I, for your sake, hope you don't because I am not someone you want to love. I'm complicated and I have no idea what I am doing and I for sure don't know how to love without hurting people. That´s how I fucking love you Donna." He said, his face was red and his vision blurred.

She didn´t cry. She didn´t say anything for that matter. They crossed a line, a line that was 12 years long and they did it without touching. His words tore it apart and she couldn´t believe what he said.

His breathing was heavy and quick. He was starting to see clearer and he blinked a few times, thinking he wasn´t seeing right when Donna ran to him. She pushed him against the wall and kissed him passionately. He was shocked for a second before his grip around her body tightened and he started leaving a trail of kisses down her neck as his hands touched her body, memorizing how every inch of her skin felt.

It was ironic how it all felt natural and like they did it hundreds of times before. They were always one step ahead of whatever the other one was going to do and that familiarity translated into everything they did this night, knowing they could only feel like this blended into each other.

 **I hope you enjoyed reading this! Please review because I love hearing your opinions and if you have any ideas I would love to read them!**

 **-A xxx**


	2. Chapter 2

**Surpriseee :D I honestly wasn't going to update this but I just randomly re-read reviews here and everyone was so nice and hoping for a 2** **nd** **chapter and I couldn't not do it! I hope you enjoy, I don't know how long this story will be but for now lets just see where this goes! Enjoy xx**

Everything after his confession was rushed. She had no idea how she managed to run to him so fast, where she got the courage but it happened. As he was trailing her curves with his hands and she was lying on his soft bed thoughts started storming through her head. And she couldn't stop them. But she couldn't stop him either.

He was kissing his way up to her lips as he saw the confusion in her eyes. He laid beside her and asked "Do you not want this?" and hopped for an answer same as his. "I want this more than anything else" she said.

"So what are we waiting for?"

 _For you to figure out that its time to come inside._

He was about to say that he is in this, that he is not going to run away from it as she kissed him again. Surprised for the second time this evening. "I am not running away either" she said against his lips, pressing her chest to his torso. He had no idea how she knew what he was about to say, but she was Donna, of course she did.

They both wished this time would be as good as _the other time._ To be honest, that's what they both wanted anytime they had sex with anyone, but that never happened. Not even this time.

It was not as good, it was better. There were even more emotions in this, there was such feeling of safety and comfort mixed with pure need for each other and attraction. Love even.

She couldn't help but notice little things. The way he played with her hair as he removed her last piece of clothing, the way he looked her in the eyes before he entered and couldn't stop kissing her.

She moaned but he knew the sound was too much. It was too beautiful and he had to kiss her if he wanted this to last longer. This scared him. Sex was a sport to him but with her it was so different he was losing his mind with each second passing, confused but utterly happy. This was Donna.

He felt her walls tightening around him and he opened his eyes, looking at her, wanting her to see his walls crashing down as his breathing got quicker.

They fell asleep pressed together, sheets covering them and her hair tickling his face.

 **The morning after**

He woke up from the best sleep he had in as long as he can remember. There was this warmth surrounding him and he couldn't help but smile as he opened his eyes, her red hair covering his white pillow. He kissed her neck and wrapped his arms around her. He was still scared and confused but the mere sight of her calmed all wars going on inside of him.

"Good morning" he whispered in her ear. She rolled around so she was facing him as she whispered the same words in between kisses. She smiled and he couldn't help but think this sight was the most gorgeous view he has ever seen.

"You are absolutely perfect" words escaped his mouth and she threw her head back in laughter, covering her face with the sheet. "What?" he asked.

She smiled "I look like a disaster." And he shook his head. "You look as beautiful as ever, if not even more. But u do look tired. I wonder why?" and that small smile was replaced by a huge grin.

"Well yeah… I was awesome" she said, kissing him again. He pulled back "But I was even better"

She missed that banter between them, sometimes that was the only thing getting her through the long days. "I guess we will just have to agree to disagree." And she winked.

"Breakfast?" he asked. She realized just how hungry she was as he mentioned it "Omg yes please! Pancakes!"

He moved closer again "Who said anything about food?" and Donna faked a pout "Again- we will have to agree to disagree because you are making me breakfast right now. Now get up!" and she lightly slapped his shoulder, now she the one with the grin.

"You are so bossy. Its hot" Harvey added before slowly getting up from bed.

"I don't smell any pancakes" she laughed, getting up and following him into the kitchen.

 _She always did follow him but he needed her to tell the directions. Otherwise always getting lost._

 **There will be a chapter following this. Don't worry. I hope you liked this and review if u want. I look forward to reading your thoughts as always.**

 **-A xxx**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hello, it has been quite a few weeks since I updated this but I am finally starting my winter break this week and I have more time to write again. This will be the final chapter of this fic and I really hope you enjoy it! xx**

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"Soo… are we going to talk about the elephant in the room?" She asked, digging in her pancakes and absently licking her lips.

"Talk about what?" He whispered, her fork dropping on the glass table, making a dramatic noise.

"Seriously?" She asked. "I didn´t think there would be anything left to talk about after this" he said, motioning his hands at her half naked body.

"You got to be kidding me?!" She asked "so you slept with me to avoid expressing your feelings?" she asked, tears in her eyes.

"I slept with you because I wanted to…we both wanted to right?" he said, the words not coming out the way he wanted them to. She stood up, moving her chair away, supporting her body by pressing her hands against the glass table. "I also want a house in the Hamptons and that new designer bag I saw in the magazine but I don´t fucking do it if I can´t deal with the consequences!" She explained, half screaming.

"No, I didn´t mean..." he said "that was not.." he added, suddenly realising he doesnt even know how to form a sentence anymore. "You didn´t mean to sleep with me and that is not what you wanted. Yeah I figure" she said, collecting her clothes, her hands shaking.

"I can´t actually believe myself you know? Just when I think I can´t be even more stupid, surprise, I actually can be." Donna added, before he stopped her, his eyes glassy, putting his hands on her arms.

"No, I didn´t mean to say what I did. That was not what I meant. What I was trying to say is that I slept with you because you are all I want. I needed to show you how much you mean to me and everything I did last night- that was me showing you that I love you in every way." He explained, his voice soft.

"Don´t you get it? I need to hear the words Harvey. Sometimes just showing it is not enough. Haven´t you learnt that in the past 12 fucking years?" She said, pressing her hands against her forehead.

"I love you, I am in love with you, I am crazy about you Donna. You are it for me. I thought you knew that, but I guess I shouldn´t assume you always know everything. I was selfish." he said. Her eyes watered.

"See...that was easy, wasn´t it?" She said softly. "And for the record- I do know everything." She added "and you are selfish"

He smiled "so we are okay? You are going stay right?" He asked, insecure. Scared that she might leave again. She swallowed and his heart dropped because it looked like she was contemplating her choices. It hit him then.

"You are scared" he said. "What did u just say to me?" Donna asked, shocked. "You are scared" he repeated. "I am scared? You got to be kidding me!" She couldn´t believe his words. "Then you answer MY question if you are not scared" he challenged, his face dead serious. »You know which one- I asked you that night if you wanted everything and you didn´t respond. Now I didn´t either but I told you now how I love you«

"I.." she started, shaking her head "no, you didn´t exactly answer yours- you just said you do love me but what I asked was love me how?" She knew he won´t answer. "No no, I am still scared and I admit. Thats why I don´t want to answer. But you said you aren´t soo… I don´t see why you couldn´t answer then.. Do you want everything?" He asked and walked even closer to her.

She took a step back with his every step towards her. She couldn´t. She really was scared. "I am scared" she finally admitted. "I am so scared" and tears began to make their way down her cheeks again.

"I know. Me too. But its not fair to expect me to answer if you are not going to." He spoke.

"I don´t know what I want." She admitted. "I don´t either. I just know who I want" he explained and she looked away, scared of his honestly when she didn´t know if she can do the same.

»I do want everything. Gosh I want it more than anything else« she started »and its easy for me to say that because I have always known that but I don´t know if I am brave enough for it, because maybe everyone thinks you need me... but I need you too Harvey.« she added. "That's why we are perfect for each other. Because we will both work on this as much and for as long as it takes." He begged. She smiled "Do you promise?"

"I promise." He nodded and felt the sudden need to be close to her so he did what he always wanted- he hugged her. "I can´t believe we only had sex twice but we are already soo complicated." He whispered in her ear, half laughing. She relaxed in his embrace and after a few minutes said "Should we go for the 3rd round?" her hand playing with his hair.

"Its on!" He screamed, picking her up from the floor and kissing her.

They knew there will still be times of complete insecurity because if you have so much to love you also have so much to lose. It might have taken them years to realize that THE love was staring them right in the face but it wasn´t the first time, the 2nd time or the 3rd time of absolute complication for them. But from now on, they will at least find the way out together. Because people learn from their mistakes and they had 12 years of learning behind them already.

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 **Yay this is it! This fic was originally angsty and that's why I wanted to add a little complication to keep up with the rhythm. At the same time it did seem logic to me that something like that would happen if they did what they did in the heat of the moment because they always get scared and screw it up lol or don't give the other the chance to explain their words. I hope you enjoyed this fic, I know it was on the shorter side but I loved writing it anyway.**

 **Please leave a final review and let me know if you liked it or not. Ly lots and thanks for reading!**

 **-A xxx**


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